When did I get so bogged down in what I dislike about this person? No on is ever going to be like me... I'm never going to find that, why do I keep looking for this? I love him. I find this out looking at him looking at the cd rack... I don't know, had a little to drink. I love him so much...I wanna be with him for the rest of time, and we get all tangled up in the tiniest disagreements that turn into something so big. Its like the equation for marriage has been taken out. We don't talk about it anymore, I don't look forward to it anymore. He talked about it for so long and nothing came of it... What am I do now? Will something ever come of it? I'm a poor loser and I get so much from him. I remember all the time how important it is to be thankful to him, for all that he does... How do we end up in the conundrums that we do? I miss writing, I miss writing and journaling so much... Jeez.. And he gets mad at me for writing.. I don't know what to do, this is me, I stopped all this writing because I didn't have time for it. I'm in school, trying so hard to make is, trying so hard to make a life to share with him. To be able to contribute something, because I don't right now, not monitarily anyway... Man... I think I'm a bit mixed up... I wish so bad that I could read his mind, and he could read mine, but that will never ever happen... I'm a mess I suppose...
